• Podcast
  • ARL
    • Indigenous All Stars v NRL All Stars
    • Rugby League State Of Origin
  • NRL
    • The 2022 NRL Draw
    • 2021 NRL Draw
    • 2021 NRL Podcast
    • 2020 NRL Draw
    • 2015 NRL Draw
    • 2014 NRL Draw
  • ESL
    • International Origin
    • Challenge Cup
  • World
    • World Club Challenge
    • World Cup
    • Rugby League 9’s
    • NRL Auckland Nines Draw
  • Sports
    • AFL
    • Cricket
    • Rugby Union
    • Soccer
  • Guest Writers
  • League Freak
    • Web Site News
    • Sponsorship
    • Uncategorized

The Glorious League Freak – Covering Rugby League World Wide – LeagueFreak.com

  • Home
  • Podcast
  • NRL Rumours
  • RL World 9’s
  • Features
    • Player Profiles And News
  • History
    • History Books
    • The Super League War
      • The Super League War – The Clubs
      • The Super League War – The Freak
      • The Super League War – The Extras
  • Quotes
  • Look-Alikes
  • Teams
  • Rankings
  • Media
  • About
    • Bio
    • League Freaks Commentary Career
    • Contact
    • League Freak On Twitter
    • I Am Not A Journalist
    • Contribute To LeagueFreak.com
    • League Freak Mentions In The Media
    • Advertise On This Website
    • Rugby League RSS Feed
  • follow
    • Facebook
    • Twitter
    • Google+
    • RSS Feed
    • Youtube

Dane Eldridge – Long Weekend And Season Rudely Soiled By Souths

Apr 03, 2013 League Freak Featured Guest Writers 0


From the point of view of a card carrying pessimist such as myself, the major talking point from last weekend’s round of NRL will not be the glorious half-ton that my re-tootled Roosters poured on to the outstripped Eels at Allianz Stadium on Monday night.

Inside my cynical headspace, this titillating 80 minutes of tri-coloured league porn has taken a back seat to the gut-twisting horror that a successful rugby league team coming out of South Sydney can bring to those who live the league lifestyle in the East.

Yep, it’s like passing a piping hot stone to say this, but the Rabbitohs are looking more like they belong in the top four with every round gone. Maybe even higher.

Trust me, I’m ferociously uppercutting myself as my typing fingers form these words on the screen, but I reckon they even have the sufficient working parts to qualify for the NRL decider.

Of this prospect, I am genuinely frightened and in need of a Pull-up.

Last night in front of the Rooster demolition job, instead of enjoying some gleeful fist-pumping with every feathered cross of the tryline, I was too busy booking a provisional airline ticket to Sierra Leone for the October long weekend while planning the construction of my backyard bomb shelter, which if my hours of watching the Lifestyle Channel have taught me anything should be completed in around six months time just before the Grand Final.

As an Easts man who has walked this earth reliant on the Bunnies demise just as much as my own club’s success, can you blame me for such a reaction?

If this travesty occurs and Souths get within 80 minutes of the world’s biggest ever non-Hefner bunny party, then don’t call me. I’m going to be elsewhere, whether it be offshore, underground or on total sensory shutdown.

You can blame me for being ignorant of a good footy story or you can accuse me of plain Rooster fundamentalism, but there’s no way I’m going to stand by as a quivering witness to the unbearable tornado of neck tatts and Burgess brothers that’s primed to go abyssal on the finals this year.

Frankly, as a tri-coloured apostle, I would even consider it sheer negligence if I didn’t try and negotiate a reasonable price with a local manufacturer for a bulk purchase of earplugs and blindfolds in the meantime.

Sure, some may say that I might be soiling the pantaloons prematurely with the Melbourne Storm still holding the cards for outright premiership favouritism. The steamed-up coaches box window of Craig Bellamy overseeing the divine compositions of his holy trinity deserve favouritism, at least until his efficient machine malfunctions.

But if you had to pick a sole challenger, which you have agreed to do by reading this article, then surely it has to be the rock ‘em-sock ‘em-Rabbitohs in all of their fairytale-building glory.

They withstood the Des Hasler challenge by getting the Bulldogs to tap-out in a finals-like atmosphere on Good Friday, plus they have done that really irritating thing of winning games and then lamenting that they played below their best.

They have a handy bloke at fullback who seems rather adept at stealthily loitering for opportunities in opposition defensive lines that have been regularly perforated by a family of British blokes with unnaturally sized heads.

It disgusts me.

That’s why I’m getting in early with my magic mock by proclaiming Michael Maguire’s men as totally capable of qualifying for the decider and giving it a ruffle in 2013. That’s right, they’ll be there to stuff up your party on Grand Final day, so stock up on the franks and refuse entry to your pergola area to anyone that wears anything emblazoned with ‘Smith’s Crisps’ and who talks of ‘Tuggas’ and ‘Longbottoms.’

As for me?

I will be happily sunning myself in Western Africa if it happens, or chowing down on some delicious tinned asparagus under ten feet of soil while I shove cheap blue-tack in my ears.

It seems like a heavenly when compared to the thought of sighting a tickled-pink Russell Crowe.

  • Tweet
  • Share 0
  • Reddit
  • Pocket
  • LinkedIn 0
  • Email

Related


  • Dane Eldridge, Des Hasler, Guest Writer, Michael Maguire, Russell Crowe, Sydney Football Stadium
Follow The Glorious League Freak's Rugby League Page On Facebook Obstructing Defenders Is Not Allowed In Rugby League

League Freak

A well known Rugby League writer, League Freak has established a reputation among supporters of the game for his fearless commentary and unmatched insight. With a reach that spans both sides of the globe, League Freak has produced an independent network that allows him to distribute content to his many thousands of followers. He is the owner and main author of LeagueFreak.com

Related articles
  • Emma Hedges – Why Racists Don’t Deserve To Watch The Great Game Of Rugby League
    Emma Hedges – Why Racists...

    Aug 01, 2020 0

  • PK – Structure Of Sydney Clubs And New Stadia
    PK – Structure Of Sydney Clubs...

    Jun 02, 2020 0

  • Julie – The Sexiest Rugby League Team Of All Time
    Julie – The Sexiest Rugby League...

    May 02, 2020 0


You must log in to post a comment.

Become a Patron!

Ziad Warwar
Nadine
Coojee
Adam
Andy
jamescunni
Lisa
Rugby League Project
Samuel
Sandy
Katey
Oblivion NPC
Jack
Terry
Gibbo

RSS Fergo and The Freak Podcast

  • The 1997 Season
  • How To Waste £750,000 - Be Super League!
  • Super League, The World Cup And Covid With Richard Shaw-Wright
  • Launching The 2020 Rugby League Project Annual
  • Make Or Break Season Ahead For These NRL Players
  • We've Been Training The House Down!
  • The 12 Days Of Rugby League Christmas
  • Pat Walsh - The Natural
  • Rugby League Kicks A Two Point Field Goal By Promoting Leigh Into Super League
  • The York City Knights Super League Bid With Gavin Wilson
  • NRL Having Talks To Buy 51% Of Super League For $134 Million
  • Josh Reynolds To Hull FC, BS St Helens Stats, Brandon Smith's Future And Andrew Goes Viral!
  • Brent Nadens Positive Drugs Test Plus Ask Potato - #AskTheBoss
  • The 2020 King Of Rugby League Awards
  • Reaction To The 2021 NRL Draw - With Statistics!

Polls

What Should Cameron Smith Do In 2021?

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...
  • Polls Archive

League Freaks Social Network

Follow League Freak on:

Latest Rugby League Articles

  • Who Wins Next Season’s NRL?
    Who Wins Next Season’s NRL?

    Jan 27, 2021 0

  • Bulking Up – Rugby Union’s Biggest Body Transformations
    Bulking Up – Rugby Union’s Biggest Body...

    Jan 26, 2021 0

  • Could This Be The End Of The Traditional Scrum?
    Could This Be The End Of The Traditional Scrum?

    Jan 12, 2021 0

  • Get Your NEW NRL Podcast For The 2021 NRL Season!!!
    Get Your NEW NRL Podcast For The 2021 NRL Season!!!

    Jan 06, 2021 0

  • Nigel Owens’ Reveals Three Ways For Referees To Make Rugby More Exciting
    Nigel Owens’ Reveals Three Ways For Referees To Make...

    Dec 22, 2020 0

Follow League Freak on Twitter

My Tweets

Tags

Andrew Ferguson (262) ARL (61) Australia (155) Benji Marshall (86) Billy Slater (76) Broadcasting Deal (65) Cameron Smith (59) Channel 9 (71) Daniel Nichols (122) Disgrace (73) Eligibility Rules (64) England (141) Expansion (76) Fergo And The Freak (283) Greg Inglis (99) Guest Writer (332) Israel Folau (67) Jarryd Hayne (78) Johnathan Thurston (81) League Freak (362) Leeds Rhinos (57) Marketing (65) Matthew Elliott (70) Mitchell Pearce (62) New South Wales (93) New Zealand (137) NRL Finals (59) NRL Salary Cap (95) Paul Gallen (64) Player Movement (112) Podcast (306) Queensland (69) Referees (78) RFL (144) Robbie Farah (57) Rugby League History (67) Rugby Union (191) Sam Burgess (62) Sonny Bill Williams (91) State Of Origin (153) St Helens (63) Todd Carney (62) Wayne Bennett (81) Wigan (58) World Cup (166)
As featured on NewsNow: NRL newsNRL News 24/7

Meta

  • Log in
  • Entries feed
  • Comments feed
  • WordPress.org

Blogroll

  • The Glorious League Freak.
  • League Freak on Twitter
  • League Freak on Facebook
  • Rugby League Podcasting Network
  • NRL Breaking News
  • NRL Rumours
  • RLWorld9s.com

Facebook Pages

  • NRL Gossip
  • NRL Infinite

Features

  • King Of Rugby League
  • Rugby League Look-Alikes
  • Biggest Winning Margins In Rugby League History
  • Biggest Crowds In Rugby League History
  • Rugby League Quotes
  • Rugby League Dictionary
  • The Super League War
  • The New Zealand Haka
  • Funny Rugby League Teams
  • Rugby League Rankins Lists
  • NRL Rumours
  • IHateRugbyUnion.com
  • NRL History
  • NRL History Books
  • Record Books
  • Player Profiles

Other Links

  • Submit Your Australian Blog
  • Best Junk Hauling Virginia
  • Gutter Cleaning Service Virginia
  • Best Lawn Mowing Service Virginia
  • 2020 NRL Draw

Other Sports

  • Clutch Fans
  • Sportette

Players

  • Cameron Smith
  • Kayln Ponga
  • Sonny Bill Williams
  • Jarryd Hayne
  • Andrew Johns
  • Semi Radradra
  • Sam Burgess
  • Benji Marshall
  • James Tedesco
  • Cooper Cronk
  • Johnathan Thurston
  • Anthony Mundine
  • Sam Tomkins
  • Greg Inglis
  • Jamie Peacock

Rugby League

  • Rugby League Project
  • Era Of The Biff
  • Darryl's Rugby League
  • Jamie Lyon Web
  • Rugby League Review
  • Rugby League Ratings
  • NRL CEO Fantasy League
  • QLD Panthers
  • Andrew Ferguson's Website!
  • Black Swans RLFC
  • InternationalRL
  • 2021 Rugby League World Cup
  • Rugby League Mums
  • Player Profiles

Rugby League Podcast

  • Best Rugby League Podcast
  • Best NRL Podcast
  • Best Super League Podcast
  • Best Australian Podcast
  • Best Sports Podcast
  • Funniest Podcast
  • Best Comedy Podcast
  • NRL Radio
  • 2021 NRL Podcast
Google+
  • National Rugby League
  • Rugby League State Of Origin
  • Brisbane Broncos
  • Canberra Raiders
  • Canterbury Bulldogs
  • Cronulla Sharks
  • Gold Coast Titans
  • Manly Sea Eagles
  • Melbourne Storm
  • New Zealand Warriors
  • Newcastle Knights
  • North Queensland Cowboys
  • Parramatta Eels
  • Penrith Panthers
  • South Sydney Rabbitohs
  • St George/Illawarra Dragons
  • Sydney Roosters
  • Wests Tigers
  • The King Of Rugby League Awards
  • Rugby League Player Profiles And News
  • Fantasy Rugby League Teams
  • Rugby League World Rankings
  • Rugby League Look-Alikes
  • International Rugby League News
  • National Rugby League
  • European Super League News
  • Featured Guest Writers
  • Other Sports
  • The 2021 NRL Draw
  • The 2022 NRL Draw – Every NRL Game Listed For You!!!
  • Advertise On LeagueFreak.com
  • About LeagueFreak.com
  • Contact Us
  • RSS Feed
  • NothingButLeague.com
  • Rugby League Podcasting Network
  • NRL Breaking News
  • NRL Rumours – Latest NRL Rumours
  • NRL Podcast
  • Super League Podcast
  • Rugby League Podcast
  • Here Is The Cure For COVID 19
Copyright LeagueFreak.com 2020 / All rights reserved
  • Advertise On LeagueFreak.com
  • About LeagueFreak.com
  • Contact Us
  • RSS Feed
  • NothingButLeague.com
  • Rugby League Podcasting Network
  • NRL Breaking News
  • NRL Rumours – Latest NRL Rumours
  • NRL Podcast
  • Super League Podcast
  • Rugby League Podcast
  • Here Is The Cure For COVID 19